The Ups and Downs of Pregnancy

Ah, pregnancy, it's a beautiful/amazing/frightening/uncomfortable and-practically-every-other-adjective-you-could-think-of thing. It's an incredibly slow and an incredibly fast moving experience and for anyone who has not yet traveled down this road I'd like to describe some of the ups and downs. Warning: the ups are mushy, the downs are complain-y, but all are honest.

The Ups:

• It's truly amazing to marvel at the beauty of nature, how a female body just knows what to do to make a new life and a new body from the raw materials of her own. With just the right timing + one missing ingredient her body will take care of the rest with no conscious action from the mind. I didn't know I was pregnant until I was already 6-7 weeks and by the time I went to the doctor there was already a heartbeat - a secret little life growing in the depths of my being - amazing!
• Feeling that fetus moving around is so special, it's not just about the kicks but whole body rearrangement, hiccups, and the occasional somersault, this kid already has personality! And once the movement begins, that's when it becomes real, and my body isn't really 'my' body anymore, it's the protective shell of something much more important that I couldn't possibly infringe upon by being selfish (and it's more difficult to be selfish too because he lets me know if I'm walking too fast, not eating enough, not sleeping enough, or not stretching adequately, I basically have to make the time to take good care of myself because it means taking good care of him).
• Becoming a family - so what if Josh and I aren't married, we've felt like family for a long time, but now we have a mutual reason for being. This tiny little person who technically doesn't even exist yet is now going to be the most important thing in our lives, and we need each other in a whole new way - a little scary but also sort of the ultimate subconscious goal of humanity.
• Boobs get bigger (but they're sore so be gentle).
• Having a super special secret relationship with yourself, ok that one is weird but it's pretty cool to be doing some ordinary thing like riding on the train or working and feel the blips and flutters of your new little friend from within, sure people can see that you're pregnant but no one can penetrate that bond.
• No period for 9 months!
• People give you a seat on the subway, well not always, but if you really want to sit you just shake that big ol' belly in someone's face and you'll get that seat.
• Experiencing childbirth - ok many might say that's not an up because a lot of focus is on the fear and pain, but if you have a natural childbirth it's also a transcendental and unique experience that connects you to something deep and meaningful that is a feminine privilege. It's also a great chemical cocktail of oxytocin and adrenaline and literally releases the love hormone that permanently alters the mother's brain to be in tune with the child and develop a protective instinct. I think that's pretty cool. (Clearly I haven't gone through this part yet so I'll let you know how it goes)
• Attunement to feminine energy - this experience is something that women have gone through since the dawn of (wo)man and when fear and doubt about whether I can actually do this creep into my mind I find comfort in knowing that many women have come before me and survived and many will come after, there will even be some somewhere in the world who are experiencing childbirth at the same exact time! I've spoken to women at my prenatal yoga class and other related events and there's definitely this amazing sense of community and shared experience that blows me away, it's pretty freakin powerful, and I realize more and more the emotional, spiritual, and physical strength women possess and the connection we all have to each other.
• Being pregnant means you can ask people to do stuff for you, like lifting that box over there, giving a much needed shoulder rub, or making a snack. Hey, take advantage, you could use the break and people are usually glad to help.

The Downs:

• Lots of peeing, and I mean freaking constantly peeing! In the early stages it is due to the kidneys kicking into gear with the changes in blood volume and the constant need to expel toxins from the body, and later on it is due to the physical weight of the growing uterus pushing on the bladder. 
• Nausea, usually in the first trimester but it can come back randomly at any time.
• Random aches and pains - back pain is the most common and consistent, but there's also random leg cramps in the middle of the night, uterine stretching, muscle tension, hip joint discomfort (those loosen during pregnancy in preparation for expansion in childbirth), headaches, and more (and you can't take pain killers so you have to learn to deal with it and ask for backrubs). 
• Gas, yep, gas.
• Random dizziness - so stay hydrated!
• Itchy belly and other parts of the body, from the stretching of the skin.
• Slow walking, it physically hurts to walk too fast after the 5th month, especially if you're carrying something heavy.
• Can't lift heavy stuff, it's not just that you 'shouldn't', it might not feel that bad to lift while you're doing it, but you'll regret it afterwards.
• Clothes don't fit, you go from wishing you'd start showing already so everyone would know to seeking comfort in the expandable waistline. Pants are the first thing to go, then shirts because they slowly rise over the belly from the friction of walking, then you find yourself trying on everything you own and running to the computer to order online from maternity.com.
• Sleeping discomfort, this one was really tough for me to get used to (still is). Not only are you peeing an average of twice in the night, but after around the 5th month you can't really sleep on your back, you can only sleep on the sides preferably with a pillow between the knees to help keep the back aligned. Might not sound that bad but try ONLY sleeping on your sides for days weeks and months and it can really get uncomfortable.
• Braxton-Hicks contractions, these basically occur throughout pregnancy but most women don't feel them until the third trimester. They are basically practice contractions that just happen as the body prepares for labor (again, what brilliant design!) and can feel like menstrual cramps.
• You HAVE to do some exercise, no matter how busy you are it makes all the difference if you do or do not stretch every day, at least for me. If I don't stretch for at least 20 minutes every day all the aches multiply.
• Weight gain, this is a totally necessary part of the process and I'm generally content with my preggo body but all those little comments like 'wow, you're really big now' or 'ouch, don't sit on my lap you're too heavy' can really add up and make you feel like a big round mound of moo-moo wearing fatness.
• All of the above have been physical, but there's also the stress of choosing a healthcare provider, finding the right hospital, learning about the process of childbirth, preparing the home for a baby, preparing for a leave of absence at work. All that stuff adds up and can be quite stressful so it's best to just do one thing at a time, but really all that baby needs when it comes out is a nipple and luckily you've got those already attached.